Therapy 101: "It's Work and It's Worth It"

In recent years, the stigma around mental health and therapy has started to decline. More and more people, including many celebrities and professional athletes, have spoken openly about their experiences in therapy. There is greater collective awareness when it comes to the benefits of therapy. However, many people still have never been to therapy and may not know what to expect. Some others have had negative experiences in therapy that may have left them not wanting to try it again. This website is dedicated to demystifying the process of therapy.

Check out each section below to learn more about what you might expect in therapy, ways to prepare for your first appointment, and how to approach both therapy and your relationship with your therapist. Content below includes important information, “myth-busting” video clips featuring Counseling Center staff, and various articles for further reading.

The Counseling Center’s hours are Monday-Friday, 8:30am-5pm. To schedule an appointment, please visit the front desk in Humanities 150, call 410-617-2273, or schedule online (not available during the summer). The 24/7 Emergency Line is 410-617-5530.

1. Therapy: It’s Work and It’s Worth It

We go to therapy, in part, hoping to “feel better” …and this is one part of how therapy can be helpful. However, therapy is also about healing and growth. These processes can be challenging to navigate.
Therapy often brings us out of our comfort zone.
Therapy asks us to deepen our self-awareness and to be curious about our experience (this can be hard when we’ve been conditioned throughout our life to avoid or dismiss certain thoughts or emotions).
When we talk about “change” or “growth” in therapy, this is not to imply that clients are solely responsible for their struggles.
- All of us have had challenging experiences in life and things have often happened to us that shouldn’t have.
- Many of us hold historically marginalized identities and the things we struggle with are not a product of our behavior or decisions, but how the world treats us and how it is stratified to value and protect some people while harming others.
Exploring “growth” in therapy does not mean ignoring all of this. It means reflecting on what part of our experience we can begin to feel agency and empowerment around.
Further reading:
- 4 Ways Bravery Leads to Braver Therapy

2. What is the role of the therapist/counselor?

To provide a non-judgmental and empathic space in which a client can openly explore and better understand their struggles, as well as their thoughts, feelings, and behaviors.
To help clients explore strategies to cope with their struggles.
- Note: there is often tension at play here too! As clients, we often want strategies or suggestions. But as human beings, we also often struggle with change.
- So, we can enter therapy with some mixed feelings—part of us really wanting to grow and heal, and part of us feeling afraid or hesitant to try new things.
To be honest with clients.
To help clients develop more self-compassion and empathy toward their own experience.
To be a collaborator and guide within the client’s journey.
To provide psychoeducation when it comes to helping clients better understand what they are struggling with.
To be conscious of the environmental, social, political, and cultural factors that impact a client’s experiences and journey
Be devoted to a lens that identifies how oppression, privilege, accessibility, and other experiences of systemic power and identity stratification are impacting a person and need to be addressed in the work.
Therapists/counselors are NOT:
- “Fixers.” Their role is not to wave a “magic wand” and help someone never feel stressed, anxious, sad, lonely, or angry again. Instead, they can help clients build coping skills and strategies to better manage these emotions, to form more meaningful relationships, and to exercise greater levels of feeling grounded and steady.

Further Reading:
- 5 Things Your Therapist Wants You to Know
- 8 Ways That Therapists Can Perpetuate White Supremacy — Ji-Youn Kim (itsjiyounkim.com)

3. What is the role of the client in therapy/counseling?

Your time in session is valuable, and to make the most of it, arrive on time and communicate about illness or cancellations by calling your therapist as soon as possible to reschedule.
To reflect on what they want to get out of therapy. The client, with the therapist’s help, should work to identify their goals for the work.
To be willing to be open, vulnerable, and honest with the therapist. This may be hard at first, and it may take time, but the more we can begin to say hard things with our therapist, the more we get out of the work and the more likely they are able to help us.
To give feedback! Believe it or not, most therapists want to know if therapy isn’t helping, if clients don’t like coming to sessions, or if the therapist said something that frustrated a client or left the client feeling unseen or misunderstood. Therapists want to address this. We also enjoy hearing positive feedback about what is working. Therapy provides a wonderful opportunity for clients to practice the difficult skill of telling the therapist how they feel.
To take what they learned, discussed, reflected upon, or practiced in therapy sessions and apply these things out in the world in between sessions.

Further Reading:
- Should I Censor Myself in Therapy

4. What are some common misconceptions people bring into therapy?

Myth: Your therapist will take the lead in every session.
Reality: Therapy is a collaborative experience that relies heavily on your needs, goals, and insights. While your therapist will suggest certain techniques or approaches through which to address your needs, you are integral in guiding the session.
Myth: That the only “work” that happens in therapy happens during appointments.
Reality: Clients who take what they learned from sessions and apply it in their lives between sessions tend to get the most out of their time working with a therapist.
Myth: That “talk therapy” is the only approach to therapy.
Reality: Sometimes therapeutic work can involve writing, art, listening to music, walking outside, bodily movement or other somatic experiences, etc.
Myth: Individual therapy is the most helpful modality.
Reality: In truth, group therapy can be an incredibly powerful and effective (in some cases, the most effective) form of therapy.

Further Reading:
- What to Expect in Your First Teletherapy Visit
- 5 Mistakes I Made in Therapy

5. How do you know if therapy is/is not working?

There is no definitive answer for how to know whether therapy is or isn’t working as the therapeutic journey will look different for everyone and include some highs and lows along the way. However, there are some questions you can ask yourself to get a sense of if therapy is progressing the way you need it to?

Are your goals being met? At the beginning of every therapeutic experience, you will outline goals with your therapist. Is the work you are doing actively addressing and helping you take steps towards meeting those goals? If not, you should check in. It’s also okay if, upon reflection, your goals have changed; you want to communicate that with your therapist so the direction of the work can reflect those alterations.
Are you getting a band-aid or are you getting stitches? When you think about the techniques being applied, does it feel like you and your therapist are just hopping from crisis to crisis and finding a short-term fix until the next thing pops up, or are you embodying elements of change in ways that allow for you to be proactive and that can be sustained?
Are you applying what you are discussing in your sessions to your life and your relationships? Does it feel as though you are implementing values-based changes that can apply to multiple areas and facets of your life and your connections? If not, that may be something to address.
Do you feel like you can be yourself with your therapist? Are you engaging in the true work of healing and adapting as a result of therapy, or do you feel like you’re performing for your therapist? Are you hoping to always “get it right” and out of fear for “getting it wrong” you aren’t being open and honest with yourself or your therapist? If so, this needs to be addressed.

Further Reading:
- 6 Therapist Phrases That Are Hard to Hear (But Helpful)
- Please Don’t Ghost Your Therapist

6. Tips for getting the most out of therapy

Work towards having clearly defined goals – and check in on them. It’s okay if you are struggling and you don’t know right away what you want to get out of therapy. But the most important first step in therapy is to work toward clarity around this.
Prepare for your sessions (journaling, thoughts/notes, specific experiences and examples). Many things can come up in a person’s life or experiences in between sessions and it is unlikely that all of them can be covered in any single session. Preparing for session by organizing some of your key thoughts, feelings, or questions, preparing some specific examples, or noting specific needs from that day’s session can be helpful for you to organize yourself and your therapist to know how to spend your time together.
Apply material discussed in therapy to your life and interactions. Therapy is most beneficial when you think of the skills as transferable and apply them in various facets of life. Like any skill, practice is also important so you will be able to use the skill with more confidence and ease when you need it. Finding ways to practice that material discussed in therapy is essential. For example, are you looking for ways to set boundaries with a friend? Practice different sentences you may say in a scenario or come up with your limits and practice how to implement them. Need to learn how to express yourself more with a partner? Think of ways being expressive in general can be more beneficial to you and try those out.
Engage in holistic wellness (sleep, eating, socializing, physical activity). Our mental health cannot be separated from other facets of health and well-being and vice versa, if we aren’t sleeping, taking care of our bodies, or finding balance in our lives in relationships, it will show up in our mood and thinking. Looking at other areas of our wellness is imperative.

Further Reading/Resources:

*Please note that many “further reading/resources” links above have been created by mental health providers or organizations not affiliated with Loyola University Maryland Counseling Center. As such, while these are beneficial resources, including these articles as further reading does not reflect the Counseling Center’s endorsement of all content within every article.